We blog about helping Long Island families to resolve conflicts in the most productive ways possible.

Oct 24, 2015BY: Neil Cahn

Divorce Litigation: Can Parents Afford the Real Price?

In yesterday’s Huffington Post, Rosalind Sedacca, a Divorce & Parenting Mentor and Founder of the Child-Centered Divorce Network for parents, notes that the inclination of a divorcing parent may be “to lash out, to get back at your spouse . . . . Hiring the most aggressive litigious divorce lawyer you can find seems like your smartest choice.”

Ms. Sedacca warns that in contested divorce litigation you stand by as attorneys and judges make decisions about your life. The result may be a feeling of being violated and helpless, “unimaginable stress and frustration compounded by a sense of powerlessness.”

If you’re a parent who is thinking along those lines, you’re making a choice you may long regret — at a price you can little afford!

Ms. Sedacca advises, however, that “Before engaging that ‘killer’ attorney, talk to a Collaborative Divorce attorney who specializes in creating peaceful outcomes without going to court. Collaborative Lawyers are trained to use their own special skills along with the aid of financial planners, therapists, mediators and other resources to bring both sides into conversation about win-win outcomes. Children’s needs get high consideration.”

On Long Island, each member of Collaborative Divorce Resolutions, is an independent professional who is trained in the Collaborative Process and experienced in assisting divorcing couples take control of their divorce and work through to solutions that meets their interests and those of their children.

What attracts me to being a Collaborative Attorney is balancing my roles as counselor/advisor for my client, while using the mediation skill set to work with the Collaborative Team to help the couple, themselves, efficiently address financial interests, emotional hurdles, and the needs of the children.

Only Collaborative Divorce presents the opportunity for an interdisciplinary team to work through the stresses of divorce. Each spouse is empowered, not powerless. Each spouse will be heard, minimizing frustration. The couple makes its own decisions in a safe, private environment.

Collaborative Divorce is not touchy-feely psychobabble. It can be hard work. However, it’s the divorcing couple’s best opportunity to reach their resolution efficiently and to move on.

The author, Neil Cahn, is a member of the Collaborative Divorce Resolutions law group of Long Island which is an association of attorneys, family specialists and financial neutrals specializing in the collaborative process. If you would like to learn how this alternative to traditional divorce litigation can work for you, feel free to contact Neil Cahn. Contact information along with a brief bio can be found on the author's profile page. Simply click or tap the author's image or the "View Profile" link on this page.

Filed in: Collaboration or Litigation or Mediation